This post comes from my podcast, Motivation For Moms episode 67, entitled "Regain Your Motivation | Mid-Year Check In." Be sure to subscribe to Motivation For Moms to get the latest show episodes as they are published, and please write a review, which is the ultimate gift to me.
I’m back after a couple weeks hiatus, I have SO missed recording the podcast for you, and I’m SO excited to be back. It’s June now and that means, it’s time for a mid-year check-in where we take an honest look at ourselves, and our lives, and we ask, is this where I want to be, and is this the way I want to be living my life? I for one, cannot believe that we’re already halfway through 2020. Today I want to talk about regaining your motivation. And like many of us, if you find yourself in a place now where you don’t even know where to begin with restarting on your goals, your personal development, bettering yourself and your life…or just getting back on track with basic habits and routines, if you’ve lost motivation and you’re struggling to pull yourself up back to a place where you’re feeling positive, and on top of your game… then this episode is for you and I hope that by the end of the episode, you feel motivated and empowered to take charge of your life again. I am so glad you’re here with me today. I’ve got a very exciting personal update for you right after the intro, so stay tuned.
I am so glad you’re here, if you’re new to the show, thank you for listening and for taking the time to listen to something positive today to better yourself. I always like to say this, that when you work on yourself, when you invest in yourself, whether it’s time for yourself, or money in yourself, and especially in anything that makes you a better person, a better mom, a stronger and happier person, you are helping to make the world a better place, because for one thing, you’re setting an example for your kids, and giving them permission to grow up and do the same. And, standing in our light inspires those around us to stand in theirs. It starts with us, it starts with working on our mindset, working to better ourselves before we can help anyone else, doesn’t it?
I hope you stick around, I truly enjoy making these episodes for you and engaging with you on social media, and through email, and for those of you who have become my life coaching clients, I’ve personally gotten so much joy out of my relationship with you, so thanks for tuning in again today.
Okay guys, I’m so excited to share my big news today, the reason that I have not put out an episode in a couple weeks, is that…. I had my baby boy! He was born on May 16 at a little over 40 weeks. He was born a whopping 10 pounds 4 ounces, and YES I had an epidural, and I got no shame in my birth game. We named him Atlas Beau. I’ve always loved the name Beau and my girls are Audra Belle and Autumn Bentley and so naturally we wanted to do an AB name again, and I let my husband pick his first name, so by day 3 in the hospital we finally decided it would be Atlas, which is very appropriate for him, he’s a big strong boy and I think its a strong name… AND I don;’t know about you, but when I think of Atlas, I think of a world map, of course, and one thing my family has missed SO much during this pandemic is traveling, and so for us, his name sort of represents something positive we’re holding onto, a hope of something that we’ll all get to do again soon in hopefully the near future. So that’s what I’ve been up to.
And, I have to admit that during these last couple of weeks, I have missed working as much as I normally do, so much. I’ve been trying to just put the podcast and my business and social media aside for a hot minute, so I can enjoy my new baby, and try to establish a new normal at home, but I’ll admit that every single day I have some sort of what I call, “Shouldy” thoughts, do you have these?
Shouldy thoughts are thoughts of “I should do this, I should record an episode for motivation for moms. I should open up my coaching calendar. I should post on social media. And then, of course, there’s all of the thoughts of “I should have my girls clothes all organized and put away when I find them in piles on the floor. I should clean my car. I should process the piles of mail on my counter.” And as I notice these thoughts coming up, I remind myself, yes all of these things need to get done, but I’m doing my best right now, and instead of letting these thoughts continue to weigh on me, I simply write them down, and schedule in a tentative day I plan to take care of them.
What I want you to do, is notice your “shouldy” thoughts. And when they come up for you, I want you to replace them with a more decisive response. So either, I will, or, simply, I won’t right now. Try to keep your responsibilities and your burdens in perspective. If you just had a baby like I did, or you’re working full time and you’re homeschooling your ids, or you’ve been sick or taking care of sick family members, or you’ve been struggling with anxiety or depression, or whatever the case may be, if you’re plate is full to the max right now, then I want your response to those “shouldy” thoughts to either be, “I will, and then you schedule in a time of when you will do them,” or, “I wont. Because my plate is full right now and some things need to take a backseat.” You’re the boss. And I want you to take control of these things that eat at you in the back of you mind all day, I want you to be the boss of them and tell them where their place is. It truly helps if you write them down and make a list of your current priorities, and especially your non-negotiables.
Now, let’s talk about a different scenario. And remember, there’s no shame either way here. Where you are is where you are. However you’ve coped with life during these past couple months especially, is how you’ve coped with life. So there’s no guilt, and no shame. But, if you have found yourself in a place, where you’ve lost some of your positive routines and habits that you once kept, if you’ve picked up some new habits like day drinking to deal with stress, or eating a few servings of ice cream every single night, or you’ve stopped praying or journaling or you’ve quit your morning workout, or you stopped working on a goal, or whatever it is you were once doing before the pandemic hit, then it’s time to be really honest with yourself, and ask yourself, am I coping? Or has my “coping” turned into new habits that I’m having a hard time beating? Have I simply lost motivation, lost momentum, and maybe I’ve found it hard to pick back up where I left off?
It’s easy to let months now pass without giving much thought to where you’re at in your life in terms of where you really want to be, and many of us have been living in reactive mode, coping as best we can with the stress and uncertainty and adjustments to life we’ve had to make over the past couple of months, and maybe during this time you’ve let yourself go in some regards. I want to tell you, that it’s okay, but it may be time now to using “coping” as an excuse to not do anything. We’re in June now, which is exactly halfway through the year, and as far as I see it, why not take this time to do a mid-year reset, and make a decision about how you’re going to move forward. Are you going to keep living in reactive mode, or are you going to be proactive about the choices you make in your daily life?
Now, if you’re feeling overwhelmed already, and the thought of trying to work towards some big goal or trying to incorporate some big new changes into your life seems daunting, I want you to start small. What small changes can you make in your life today, that if you started practicing regularly and consistently, would have a big positive impact on your life? Remember, consistency is key.
So for example, if the house is overwhelming you right now, can you commit to making the bed every morning, and perhaps having your kids make they bed in the morning too, or maybe commit to just 15 minutes of everybody cleaning up every day after dinner, maybe put a couple bins around the house for the kids to toss their toys in instead of leaving them on the floor. Or put one load of laundry in every morning as part of your routine. There’s got to be something that you can start doing more consistently that will begin to make a difference, make your life easier, and show results.
Another example, how about for your health and fitness. What if you got your biggest water container and you commit to drinking the entire thing every morning right when you wake up. Or you got up 20 minutes earlier and did a 20 minute YouTube workout in your living room every morning. Or can you commit to more mindful eating? Instead of a giant bowl of ice cream and maybe a second, can you allow yourself a small scoop, and take your time savoring and enjoying that more reasonable amount? Personal development. What would happen if you set aside 15 minutes per day to read, or you committed to listening to one personal development podcast like this once every single day, or what if part of your morning routine was to sit down with your journal and write out all your goals and dreams. Or fill out your Mama Miracle worksheet, which, if you don’t have that yet, you can go download it for free at TheMamaMiracle.com. I’ve got tools for you sister so take advantage.
Making positive change does not have to be a giant life overhaul. It can start with taking small, but consistent steps, and before you know it, one positive thing will lead to another, your motivation will begin to compound, and getting to where you really want in your life won’t seem so daunting.
So by now you may already have some ideas of what you could change or start doing, but if you need a more concrete place to start, I always like to start by examining my morning and nighttime routines. I’ve done previous episodes about this before, so if you want a more in-depth conversation about morning and nighttime routines go back through previous episodes. Consider your morning and nighttime routines to be like the bookends of your day, this is your sacred time, so treat it as such. You can totally change the entire course of your day by starting with intentional practices. So if you don’t already have these in place, start here. Get out your notebook and write down what your ideal morning and nighttime routine looks like. Does it include something for your mind, body and spirit? Does it include something to keep productivity at home on track? Make your bed every day. Start a load of laundry. Unload the dishwasher. These are basic things that as a mom, can help you stay organized and keep the function of your home. But what about your spirituality? Can you meditate, or pray, for 5 minutes each morning when you wake up? You can do this before you even get out of bed. Whatever you want to start doing, you’ve got to schedule it in, because otherwise, everything and everybody else’s agendas will come flooding in and sap up all of your tine. We’ve got to set aside time for the things that are important to us in advance. If you need a jumpstart to how to more effectively use a planner, then check out my Planner Makeover Course at www.plannermakeovercourse.com where you’ll learn tricks like establishing non-negotiables, when to sit down and plan, how long it should take you, and how to use a planner to reach a goal.
If you have lost your motivation to live your best life and have settled into the mindset of just getting by, then there’s a good chance it’s because you’ve stopped dreaming. You’ve become so caught up in the daily grind, in the news, in social media, in the cooking and cleaning and you need to come out of your forest so you can see the trees. You’ve stopped thinking about some future goals or plans that get you excited to get up every morning and crush the day. So I want you to find something to get excited about. Something big picture. What is possible for you and your family? Raise your standards, expand your field of vision of what you see for yourself. We create our reality, and if you’re not happy with your current reality, you can change it.
It’s worth mentioning that it’s easy to motivate ourselves when we have a defined end or beginning date. It’s easy to give up bad habits January first because that represents a defined change of times in our life. But with what we’ve all been going through with the world being out of sorts these last few months with no defined end in sight….. I mean we don’t know when or if the world will get back to normal. We don’t know when businesses will open up again, and school will be back in session, or if the world will be free from the fear of the virus. And because of that uncertainty, it can be hard to commit to change because we’re unsure if the world around us can sustain the change we want to make. But if you’re listening to this when this episode is released, then you’ve got the perfect opportunity to take advantage of this mid-year point, and decide, decide right now, that you are going to OWN 2020, regardless of the circumstances of the world around you. Because no matter what’s going on in the world, you can choose to make positive choices for yourself and your family. You deserve to live the life you dream of, and you have the power to create that life. It’s time to start dreaming again. It’s time to start setting goals again. And it’s time to take ownership. And it can start with small positive steps.
Thanks for being here today. Thanks for believing in me, for believing in yourself. I believe in you, and you inspire me! Now go out there. Take charge of your day. You beautiful, powerful, and incredible mama. Lots of love, talk to you soon.